I have always been worried about my height. I’ve always felt like, I was too tall. when I was younger, I was taller, than most of the girls. It horrified me when a short guy was standing next to me. Making it so obvious, how tall I was for my age.
It took me a long time, to look at myself differently, and not even care about the height thing. A friend of mine told me that, height did not matter, because when we are in a vertical position, we are the same height. He was a short man, and that is what even influenced me, to give a short guy a chance. He is the first short guy, that I was interested in my life, I really wish it had went further. He was my best friend. Since I am 5’9″, I don’t feel comfortable about wearing heels, on a date with a man, who is shorter than I am. Which can change the whole outfit, and you know how hard it was, to pick that one.
So I think that maybe, you should cook dinner for a short guy, if you have a date with him. I feel that would really be rubbing, the height thing in his face. I am not comfortable, about bending over to kiss my date good night, if he is short than me, it is kinda awkward. I guess it wouldn’t be so bad, if we were sitting down or something. Sitting down, while they stand, is cool. It took me a little while to get use to my short best friend. Keeping him as a friend, help me out, although he was a great guy. He might have been thinking the same thing about me. We never explored a relationship, although we loved each other, very much. Kinda like that movie Brown Sugar, and how there friendship was.
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Allow me to begin with the statement that I am 6’3″ tall… and I usually wear cowboy boots, so the two-inch heels make me 6’5″. I am also a man… a single man… a single man with a serious weakness for tall women; kindred spirits “in the fell clutch of circumstance,” as it were. With so many women writing, I hoped a masculine view would provide a unique perspective.
Now, when it comes to dating, men don’t have all of the same dilemmas as women. For example (cross-dressers notwithstanding), we don’t have to worry about high heels. Short men do have that concern, but it’s that their dates will wear six-inch stilettos and give them a Napoleon Complex. Thankfully, if my six-foot date wears a pair of four-inchers, well, let me quote Frank: “Heaven, I’m in heaven, and my heart beats so that I can hardly speak…”
Nevertheless, some of the dilemmas still apply. Tall people of both genders have trouble finding shoes or shirts or pants that fit (and the fashion industry makes it even worse for women); we hit our heads on everything; the auto industry makes these dinky little Matchbox cars that we have to fold ourselves triple to fit into; and don’t even get me started on nooses… um, I mean… neckties.
I feel for tall women. My sister is 5’11″ and a half (she HATES that extra half inch). The issues that I have are all the worse for you; bending down to kiss or dance; holding hands or embracing; and even just standing side-by-side with an arm around your date. There’s no solution, either. There’s no feasible way to make yourself shorter. You can only soldier on and trust that everything happens for a reason.
Take heart; when Pandora opened up that box, there was still one thing left: Hope. There are still men like myself available. To paraphrase Henley, I thank whatever gods may be for your unconquerable souls. So keep the faith and stay the course. I leave you with a bit of Wordsworth:
“A Being breathing thoughtful breath,
A Traveler between life and death;
The reason firm, the temperate will,
Endurance, foresight, strength, and skill;
A perfect Woman, nobly planned,
To warn, to comfort, and command;
And yet a Spirit still, and bright
With something of angelic light.”
You are goddesses. Don’t ever let anybody tell you different.
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Yep, there are still problems with tall women and short guys. I’ve heard all the arguments (don’t get me started on Tom Cruise….)but I reached my full height at about fourteen and it is just not good. As a teen everyone just wants to fit in and that is not so easy when you stand out quite literally. That’s bad enough, but dating becomes a nightmare. For some reason there are thousands of little guys out there with a thing for tall women. Everywhere I went I would find tiny men trying to go out with me, while I was busy looking over their heads to see if there were any males out there who could actually look me in the eye – and to all of you who Will be saying but it doesn’t matter – well, yes it does. Fancy a nice romantic dance? Not when HIS head is on YOUR shoulder. Fancy doing a quick jive number instead? Try going under his arm as you twirl……..amusing at best, painful at worst. Then there are all the jokes – “you obviously like men to be in your pocket!” “He needed someone to look up to”. Trust me, I’ve heard ‘em all. Several times. So I developed an uncanny ability to judge the height of others from a sitting position. I got really good at it. Any mistakes and the shoes would come off in an attempt to make myself look wild and spontaneous – but that meant doing some pretty freaky dancing, which probably put a lot of men off, not just the short ones. My saving grace was Princess Diana, who single-handedly brought flat shoes back into fashion (being at least a couple of inches taller than poor Charles who had to be posed up steps or on small hillocks whenever they were photographed together).
The good news is I finally found the guy for me – he is just an inch taller then me, but that’s enough not to be pointed out in the street.
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As if it isn’t hard enough for men to approach women for fear of rejection, but to approach a woman who stands 6 feet 3 inches barefoot? Nearly impossible. I hate to say it but men’s egos are fragile and easily bruised, and with all the ideals about how fragile and delicate the opposite sex is, who would think that it would come in a package so lofty?
Taller women such as myself experience such difficulty in dating because our height is intimidating. Men view women of my stature as competition in a sense. Your height if equally or greater than his incites fear and submission, and we know he can’t have that! “You look like you could knock me out!”, I’ve been told. This is the perception that men get because you don’t fit into a petite package.
Ironically taller men don’t seem to be attracted to taller women, but shorter men on the other hand seem to love them. Well some of them. Vertically challenged men seem to have a point to prove and in what other way to do it with this beanstalk like creature on his arm? This will definitely imply conquer and defeat to your comrades. Although I don’t discriminate if you are a gentleman I’ll give it a try, but honestly who wants to have a man looking dead at your breast all night? You have to hug him around his neck, because stooping any lower you’ll get back spasms.
And God forbid if you are fashion forward and enjoy dressing and wearing heels. You are no longer 6’3″, but 6’5″+. Do you wear flat’s? Bend your knees to reduce your height? What’s a towering beauty to do?
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Dating is a veritable maze of pitfalls, and when you’ve got something like being a “tall woman” to deal with, you have just a little more fuel to add to the inferno of difficulty. In the media, tall women are touted as goddesses, looked upon by men and women alike as an ideal, but when it comes to reality, it seems that tall women find it difficult to enter the dating scene without certain problems cropping up.
The main reason that dating is difficult for tall women is that unfortunately, most males are creatures who easily feels inadequate. Men believe that being tall, strong, and muscular are necessities; in essence men have an innate wiring that tells them they should be taller and stronger than the woman they are involved with. Whether or not a man can look at a woman on television and appreciate her long legs and tall stature, does not necessarily mean that he would feel comfortable with her at his side being 2 to 3 inches taller than him. There is also an intimidation factor involved, as being tall usually signifies strength, and if the woman at your side seems to possess more strength than you, as a man, you would most definitely feel a little less comfortable.
The above is one strike against a woman who is tall and entering the dating scene, but it by no means is something to fret over, rather it is something to keep in mind and deal with as it arises. The following tips are designed for women who have a height issue to deal with.
1) When going on a date with a man who is not quite as tall as you are, don’t add insult to injury by wearing those amazing four inch stiletto heels. Instead, go for a pair of really cute flats (at least until your date learns to embrace your long legged nature!).
2) Make sure that you direct the conversation away from your height immediately if it is brought up by putting your date at ease with something like “Wow, you have an amazing body” or “I love the way we fit together, don’t you?”. These kinds of statements will show your date that you are attracted to him despite the height difference.
3) Don’t dwell on the issue… If it doesn’t get brought up, don’t bring it up. Charm your date with your wit and the ease at which you put him around you.
In the end, being a tall woman in the world of dating can sometimes be tough, but it should be something that is embraced. Learn to deal with the issue in a manner that makes you seem comfortable to be around, not intimidating. Don’t have a chip on your shoulder, or a confidence issue surrounding your height, rather enjoy the benefits! There are millions of women out there who would kill for a couple extra inches, after all!
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No matter how swanlike you turned out to be, if you towered over all of your classmates as a young girl, you’ve probably grown up to be a little bit weird. That feeling of sticking out like a big, red, throbbing thumb could follow you around for life. At the ripe old age of 36, I’ve yet to shake all of the self-consciousness I picked up during my childhood. I’m a statuesque 5’10” and I’m still taller than most women, and quite often, I’m taller than the men I meet too. It can leave a girl feeling less than, well, girlie.
Being a tall adult has its advantages, of course. Not being referred to as “giraffe” by male suitors is a bonus (unless you’re into that sort of thing). It’s a well documented fact that tall people get more promotions, are paid higher salaries, and have more dating opportunities. What they don’t tell you is that, for tall women, many of her “dating opportunities” are lacking in the height department.
Perhaps I’m limiting myself, but I have always had a hang up about dating men that are shorter than me. It doesn’t matter how much money he makes or what other “perks” he might have, if he makes me feel like an Amazon woman he’s disqualified as a potential partner. Even tall women like to feel like a delicate flower sometimes. We want a guy that can wrap his arms around us and make us feel like a little girl, especially since we’ve probably never BEEN a little girl. Furthermore, the taller than the average girl likely has a tall father, and it is common knowledge that little girls grow up and seek out a mate that reminds her of daddy. This need for a tall mate is inherently unavoidable.
As of yet, I have not found my perfect mate. It seems that there just aren’t enough quality, height advantaged men to go around. As far as tall girls go, I’m on the low end of the height scale. If I have trouble finding a suitable man, I can only imagine what my taller sisters go through. To make matters worse, we have to compete with dainty, wispy, little women that make us feel big and gawky, not to mention angry, if we see them paired up with tall men.
My most recent date, which wasn’t that recent mind you, was with a tall, fit, Icelandic native. He was hot! He dressed well, he had great hair, he paid for dinner, and, best of all he was full 4 inches taller than me! He opened my car door; he seemed like a real gentleman. I could hardly believe I had found him on an internet dating site. Sitting across the candlelit table, gazing into his eyes, I felt giddy, I felt excited, I felt that gangly, awkward, little girl scratching her way to the surface. I beat her down with a stick and reminded myself that I am a graceful swan.
Bjorn and I went on a few more dates. He turned out to be really sloppy kisser, but I was willing to overlook it considering the other great quality he had going for him. Inexplicably, after our fourth date he stopped calling. Had I done something to turn him off? I wondered if he’d sensed my insecure inner child. On further thought, I realized that I really didn’t care. I realized that while he was tall and good looking, he was really boring, and bad kissing is just unacceptable. God only knows what else he could be bad at.
It seems that I should reevaluate the idea of dating shorter men. I could be missing the opportunity to get to know many wonderful men that are under my required height, but alas, you must be taller than 5’10″ to go on this ride. Therefore, my search for a tall, strapping buck goes on. Perhaps there’s a tall man out there who has a weird inner child like me. As they say, there is someone out there for everyone.
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